It’s time to talk about Bully Offers because they seem to be rearing their ugly heads more frequently lately. (Two agents have called me in the past three days saying their buyers want to make Bully Offers.) That’s to be expected in this type of real estate market because when buyers get frustrated by not being able to find a home they like or losing out in multiple offers, they look for any advantage they can.

What exactly IS a Bully Offer? It’s an offer made by a buyer before the offer date stipulated by the seller. For example, a seller says he’ll look at offers on Friday, but on Tuesday a buyer says “I don’t want to wait until Friday and risk being in multiple offers. Here’s an offer. It’s a really good offer, but you have to look at it today.” The seller feels bullied into looking at this offer because he doesn’t want to risk losing it and may end up selling his home to this buyer on Tuesday even though he said earlier that he’d wouldn’t look at offers until Friday.

Bully Offers aren’t illegal, but I don’t care how you look at them, they’re just plain wrong. Their name tells you all you need to know. They’re not called early offers or  pre-emptive offers, they’re called Bully Offers. I don’t know about you, but being called a bully isn’t a compliment in my books.

What’s the risk to saying no to a Bully Offer? Some buyers may not be willing to wait until the offer date so you may be left with no offers or a lower priced offer on the offer date. On the other hand, my experience has been that most buyers who submit Bully Offers like the home a lot and are willing to wait for the offer date so you could very well end up with more offers and a higher price if you say no to the Bully Offer. (It’s always up to you to weigh the risks, but both agents who contacted me about Bully Offers called back later to say their clients would wait until the offer date. The sellers ended up receiving a total of 9 offers with the highest offer NOT coming from one of the Bully Offerors.)

At the end of the day, your word is your bond. If you say you won’t look at offers until Friday, then don’t say yes to a Bully Offer and look at an offer on Tuesday. And if you’re willing to look at an offer on Tuesday, then don’t say you’re waiting until Friday. Ask yourself how you’d feel if you were a buyer who saw the home of your dreams on Tuesday morning, decided to make an offer on Friday, left on a business trip until Thursday and then came home to find out that the seller sold the home on Tuesday. You’d probably feel pretty badly so don’t make other people feel this way. It’s as simple as that.

And remember, you’re not in this alone. Talk this over with your agent to make sure you understand how the process works so you can decide when to look at offers and what you’ll say to a Bully Offer BEFORE you put your home on the market. If you’re an agent, you have a role to play in this and a responsibility to do the right thing, too. Make sure your client understands the situation. Don’t tell buyers and other agents “Offers are on Friday, but if someone brings us a good offer before then, we’ll look at it.” You won’t get in trouble for breaking any rules, but it’s still the wrong thing to do. It makes you and our business look bad.

Whether you’re an agent, a seller or a buyer, there’s no need to compromise your integrity. Ask yourself: How do you want to conduct yourself?  Are you true to your word? Would you do this in your personal life? What kind of example do you want to set? Do the right thing.